Can I say that depression sucks? Gosh to think that I have to spend the rest of my life dealing with this is... well,its depressing!
Why have I spent my whole love feeling that I wasn't good enough,that I wasn't smart enough, that I wasn't loved enough. and that I was just plain ugly.
I still feel this way about myself.
I spent my whole life with my mom on a pedistal. now I am scared to reexamine my childhood.
I mean as a mom, I know she wasn't perfect. I have always known that. None of us are. but I am scared that there are things that I don't want to admit to.
Its weird I feel so very alone in my life. why is that? I have a lot of people in my life and the potential of even so many more. Yet I feel all alone.

Brandon is doing really well in School, he is reading at such a high level. we really need to start working on the counting by 5s and 2s.
Things are going fine with Wes and I. we get along just fine. we just don't have any time alone together. Not even in bed, with the boys sleeping with us. I really need to set a goal to have them in their own beds by summer, or by the end of summer at least.
Tomorrow after my annual appt. we are going to go to the science center to buy our annual pass.
peace.