• Sunshine is Natures antidepressant
• I want my life back
• I need to take my life back from the darkness.

I hope this depression ends soon.

The way I am living my life is not the way I was raised to live it. It also isn't what I need to be happy.

I just feel like I am drowning. I can't do it all. I used to be able to do it all, what happened?

Daisy isn't any better today. If she isn't any better tomorrow I"ll have to take her back to the vet.

Amy is also sick and may have to go in tomorrow also.

Nothing happened today, Wes worked. I just cleaned a messy house that didn't get any cleaner.

The boys are both asleep. Before 8 not bad. I have a feeling that I will be following them shortly.

Last night I was a sleep at 8:30. I have just been so tired. I hope that I'm not coming down with the flu that Amy has. I can get sick right now.

Our New dog that we got from the pound Monday has kennel cough, double ear infection and a double yeast infection in her ears.

I have been so worried about her because she hasn't eaten in two days, and the only reason she has had water is because I pour it down her throat.

While trick or treating (more on that in a minute) there was a lady giving away free dog food samples. She suggested that we try can food. sure enough she ate so much. I have been so worried about her, I think that she can start getting better now.

So today was trick or treating in Burien. It amazes me how many new stores there are there. So many that I'd like to go back and try them out. Its changed so much.

The boys were Stitch and Mickey Mouse. both so cute and got so many comments.

Wes is working this weekend. I am so tired that it doesn't really even matter. I just want to sleep.

my depression today is an 8, I'm pretty sick of it.

If any of the pictures of the boys turned out from today, I'll post them.

I am so tired. I can't believe how tired I am. I can't even hold my head up.
what is wrong with me?
My house is falling apart, I can't seem to make myself care. I want a clean house, I feel so much better with a clean house. I just can't seem to do what it takes to do it and keep it up. I just don't have it in me.
I also feel that my house is so small, even when its clean it doesn't look clean.
I raised my Zoloft to 200mg last night. That is the highest that you can take. If that doesn't work I may have to change antidepressents. I really hate to do that. Zoloft is the safest you can take while breastfeeding. I know that Lucas will be a year next month, I am just not ready to wean him yet.
Do you think that if I go weeks without cleaning my house that anyone else will do it?
Thats just not fair to anybody.